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Pride Festival: Open Heart, Open Mind

July 2, 2018

pride festivalWe all start to realize the love we deserve eventually. We have conversations with individuals that enhance our life, cause us distress, or even to just pass the time. We might even have it at a pride festival. It’s important to know when to have a conversation of progression in a way versus a mundane one that really doesn’t serve a purpose, which is often times the trivial “oh, hey how are you?”

I remember dating someone for a blip of time before he left to go back to his homeland, a very far away country, and then here I am at his doorstep and didn’t feel an ounce of something further than a platonic friendship. This was actually near a time of a pride festival. My theory is that he was and still is one of those “busy” people. I’ve always been the type to be very stubborn in the sense of once my mind is made up, it’s made up for good and it’s not just a mental line to be crossed, it’s an impenetrable brick wall.

Here I am vacationing and stumble upon another man that took me by surprise. I met up with a friend of a friend for the first time and we were gossiping and giddy like sorority girls, as she fell in love with a man far from this same homeland while vacationing in Las Vegas. They made it work, because even though thousands of miles away, that obstacle seemed to be the least of their main worry. I didn’t really know what to make of meeting this gentleman, but what I knew was that this man was ready to love and be loved – he was, as we say, “husband material.” I just…knew. He showered me with daily affirmations and was always affectionate in his love for me. This might be something worth celebrating as we would at a pride festival. Yes, he told me he loved me in the very short time we spent together. At first, I was intimidated by that because the last time I made this vocal I was told, “I don’t love you back.” We’ve also been conditioned at times to run away from those words rather than towards them. He knew I was a bit slow at this process and he told me he didn’t care. For him, and as I’ve said in the past, the act of selfless giving should be enough without a gratuitous reward, and that was his mantra. It was refreshing to see it innately in someone. He didn’t need me to love him back at that moment; he needed me to understand that his declaration was real to him.

Having meaningful conversations with him, I was reminded that we as intuitive human beings start to see how that mindset creates a heightened vibration level. I mean, we probably wouldn’t find this type of acknowledgment at a pride festival. By no means do I want to place myself on a high horse or even get all hippy dippy ethereal on you, but we can have a general real sense of when things are “easy,” when vulnerable conversations become less weighted and more invigoratingly exploratory.

We start to tip toe around being honest because we ourselves can label ourselves as “too much” or “inadequate.” People that go to many a pride festival might be victim of this mentality. Leaving the door open for us to easily escape when things get more progressive is a failsafe tactic we can resort to. You see, that way of life is a harder one to life by. We formulate tactics that can cause us stress when getting to know someone should be easy. However, in today’s world of digital dating, it isn’t, so we create protective barriers to make it more navigable from hindsight.

What was such a treasure with this man was that he operated on no barriers or obstacles or “games” as we sometimes notice. It didn’t matter where I would have met him, even at a pride festival or not, he himself knew who he was. He was his own captain and he knew the trajectory of his connection with any other human in such a seamless way. It was inspiring to me and has changed my mindset for forever. Thank you.

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