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Gay Dating Help and Make The Time

November 13, 2018

gay dating helpMy birthday started on a very sad note this year. It seems I needed some major gay dating help. I remember crying in my car after I had to cancel one of my birthday events just hours before it was supposed to occur. Within that week, I was cancelled or flaked within the eleventh hour and was a victim of someone running late by 30 or more minutes at least 8 times total. The “I promise I’m not a flake” declaration was on a broken record loop. Happy birthday to me, right?

I sat there absolutely dumbfounded and disappointed. I really did need gay dating help. I’m not someone’s calendar or reminder anymore. To ease my stress, I made a promise to only account for myself when it came to planning things with others. I really can’t sit around expecting someone to be as communicative and respectful in time management as I. I need to start giving hard deadlines and being less forgiving. I need to stop throwing out my time unsolicited when I really don’t have it to give out to get nothing in return. My heart was craving that my generosity would be acknowledged even by a smidgen. I was teetering the balance between pessimism and realism. I challenge you to never say “I’ve been busy” ever again as an excuse for poor communication habits or plainly just not being sternly honest.

I then stumbled upon this article about a young boy whose mother invited 32 of his classmates to his birthday pizza party. His mother spent time even making goodie bags for everyone and it turns out, no one showed up. Not one. This, my friends, is the illness of our generation. Even when I posted this story on my personal social media, someone discounted the validity of the story. With that aside, I had countless testimonies shared from my personal inner circle that experienced a similar situation. For instance, a dear friend bought $400 worth of food and drinks for a Halloween party for 15 people, and only 5 showed, including the host. I recall my 29th birthday when I booked a Las Vegas trip on my own time and dime to find that many people were being flippant about their confirmation and disregarded the fact that I already paid for a hotel assuming they were going to chip in. In my mind, I picture this like a mother or father making a homemade meal for his or her family to find out their kids sat at the dinner table not hungry and on their phones or not even showing up. When can we start being accountable for our character? It’s not even a popularity contest anymore; it’s a contest of time. This can be seen as a major challenge for someone seeking gay dating help. You are never too busy to show compassion and gratitude. Make it a priority to be a person that values the time of another who wants to share a special moment with you.gay dating help

I started to think where our culture went wrong when it came to the value of time. especially for those seeking gay dating help. A friend told me, “it takes less effort to maintain ‘friendships’ with people so we feel like we’re closer to way more people than we really are.” Enter social media and how many people feel “close” to me and “see my posts,” but actually haven’t talked to me in years. Having been in L.A. for so long, through social media avenues we feel like we “know” celebrities. Then, we have an opportunity to meet them, and realize they are nothing like we imagined – whether that be good or bad. Social media is a complete fallacy. We are only sharing the best things in our life and never the things that truly matter. We ask for someone to be a part of a connection-building moment, but we actually don’t believe the wholehearted approach because we are so busy “not taking life too seriously.” It’s time for you to be a little more serious about your character and the friendships you claim to admire. It’s time for you to start asking if you need gay dating help.

I start looking at why dates seem to fizzle and why we get so let down and feel like we’re being strung along. I remember having a recent conversation with a colleague on how a lot of relationships have a more “masculine” role and the other has a more “feminine” role in preliminary courtship. Meaning, someone in the beginning must show more interest through dominance as the other party wishes to be told where to go. With this mentality though, confusion ensues. As I have written in my book, which is especially great in the gay dating help category, it’s that balance of the lobes in the brain. According to Dr. Pat Allen, a famous cognitive relationship expert, someone must want to be cherished and another respected to ensure relationship equilibrium during the first stage of dating. This can be seen as a pinnacle for those who need gay dating help. Within the gay community, sometimes it can be assumed that initial interest of dominance equates a certain sexual position. Not that everything these days is about deciphering and navigating through grey area, people just get tired and would rather not try. They wind up ghosting or allowing a blooming relationship to become a complete unmomentous dud.

I was telling this same colleague that in my younger years, I would almost always take the lead in the beginning by setting up plans and activities, but in reality, I would rather be the person who is told what to do and where to be. I plan things for a living and I just don’t feel like I want to have that same tactic in my personal life. Why do I take the initiative to do 100% of the effort when I am only responsible for 50%? I wonder if I should wait and sit in silence; however in today’s culture, I am less optimistic. After all, I can be responsible in how I respond or react to someone’s initiative, but it isn’t the other way around, unfortunately. More currently, I’ve waited on someone to take initiative after I’ve given my availability too many times to count to my detriment. I needed some gay dating help for sure. I am sure to never be critical of a person showing a concerted effort. I saw a funny meme the other day about someone not caring about what to eat for dinner, being offered something, and then have an antagonistic opinion on what was offered. To make it easier, if someone says “I don’t care,” I give three options to that person and let him choose. It’s about balance, right?

What I have come to find is that one has to be very patient and have surface expectations when it comes to dating. You have to be mentally ready or seek some gay dating help. Sometimes a person takes too many hits and needs a big pause. If you’re like me, you take the time to strengthen your friendships that truly matter and will be at your side at 3AM when your car dies or if you are ever in the hospital in peril. This is something I will always encourage, because as you see, sometimes love will come to you when you least expect it. I will not become the person who hurt me.

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